Letting Go of Shame & Self-Blame: Using The “Tennis Mindset” in Gentle Sleep Training
By Robynn Yip, Certified Gentle Sleep Coach®
Every year, World Sleep Day reminds us that sleep isn’t just a nightly routine — it’s the foundation of our emotional, physical, and mental well-being. This year’s theme, “Sleep Well, Live Better,” beautifully captures how quality rest truly touches every part of family life — from our babies’ steady growth to our own physical and emotional well-being, and being the best parents we can be.
As a Certified Gentle Sleep Coach®, I often remind parents that sleep coaching shouldn’t feel stressful or all-or-nothing. Instead, I like to think of it as a game of tennis.
When we first pick up a racket, we don’t expect aces every time. We serve, miss, adjust, and try again — learning little by little. The same goes for helping our infants and toddlers build healthy sleep habits. Some nights will go smoothly, others may throw you off balance, but each new day brings another opportunity to create small but significant sleep habits that can go a long way.
The “Tennis Mindset” for Healthier Sleep
As young parents in the modern world, it is easy for us to fall into cycles of guilt and self-blame, feeling like we are not doing it “right”, or not doing things as perfectly as we would like. I believe that the tennis mindset can free ourselves of that internal self-criticism cycle that, despite the best of intentions, can be toxic and too much at times.
Rather than aiming for perfection, focus on small, consistent actions that nurture both your child’s rest and your family’s well-being:
R - Keep your Routines familiar and comforting
A predictable bedtime routine serves as a sleep cue — bath, pajamas, story, and song — helps signal that sleep time is near. If your current sleep cue is rocking, a consistent bedtime routine helps to transition out of it.
E - Adjust the sleep Environment
Cool, dark, and calm rooms help little bodies relax, while white noise or a gentle sound can ease transitions into sleep.
S - Protect your daily Schedule
Regular morning wakeup times, age-appropriate naps and bedtimes help strengthen your child’s circadian rhythm and wake windows.
T - Give it Time
Improvements may not happen overnight, but it is important to keep your sleep goals in mind and have clarity over your plan, and consistency over the strategies you use. You may read my other blogs about sleep training options.
One Night at a Time
So as we honor World Sleep Day 2026, take a breath, drop the expectation of perfect nights, and embrace the journey. When your family sleeps well, you truly live better — one bedtime, one routine, one night at a time.
